Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
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I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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