after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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