ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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