I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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