I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
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Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
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You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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