I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
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