some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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