I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
The beer is more important than you right now.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
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