friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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