Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize