Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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