I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize