All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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