Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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