Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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