Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
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Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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