ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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