Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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