I am in a vortex of obligation.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
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His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
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There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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