Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Where did you get a picture of my penis
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
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