Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize