My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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