It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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