dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
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He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I enjoy the company of your penis
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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