watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize