I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
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