there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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