I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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