Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I'm bleeding and have questions
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize