So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize