Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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