Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize