I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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