either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize