Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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