rhymes with "ouble enetration"
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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