I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
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