Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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