lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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