hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
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