the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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