He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
you never un-have a 4some
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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