the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
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