There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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