I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize