well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize