can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
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