PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize