nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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