I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Everything about him screamed your future.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
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